Want a good idea just how self-important the Teflon Don is? Check this out: Donald Trump apparently thinks he’s responsible for the temporary rebranding of Budweiser beer to “America” for the summer.
You can’t make this stuff up.
Crappy Beer for Crappy Candidates
I’ve never taken a drink of alcohol before. However, even I know about the legendary reputation of Budweiser beer’s horrible taste. If you like it, more power to you. But I’ve smelled the beer before, and I think it stinks like piss, so I’m inclined to believe everyone who tells me it’s horrible.
That’s why it amuses me so much that the Teflon Don would think that he’s so important he can influence an otherwise terrible beer to change its name.
Trump made this bizarre claim on Wednesday, while making an appearance on Fox & Friends. Here, he was asked whether or not his mindless slogan — “Make America Great Again” — influenced the name change.
Now, I’m not sure why someone would think that. Anheuser-Busch announced the name change on Tuesday, noting that the company was repackaging 12-ounce bottles and cans with “America” from May 23 through the November election. In a release, Anheuser-Busch noted that:
We are embarking on what should be the most patriotic summer that this generation has ever seen, with Copa America Centenario being held on U.S. soil for the first time, Team USA competing at the Rio 2016 Olympic and Paralympic Games. Budweiser has always strived to embody America in a bottle, and we’re honored to salute this great nation where our beer has been passionately brewed for the past 140 years.
I mentioned before that Budweiser smells like piss to me — that makes this press release one of the greatest backhanded compliments I’ve ever read.
It strikes me as the sort of mindless, politically neutered but still toxic jingoistic pablum that Americans just absolutely devour. Flag-waving, eagle-hugging, heartstring-tugging baby Jesus apple pie American exceptionalistic bullshit that doesn’t stand for anything but serves to remind us there’s a substantial population of Americans who’s greatest achievement has been being born in the country with the largest military expenditure per GDP in the developed world.
A country that, it should be noted, can’t even keep its drinking water clean, it’s roads paved, or its schools functioning. A country that can’t manage basic functioning public transportation, universal healthcare, or equal rights to all citizens, and whose police show the restraint of a Darfur warlord.
Trump certainly felt that he had something to do with it either way, telling the crew at Fox & Friends over the phone that:
I think so, they’re so impressed with what our country will become that they decided to do this before the fact.
Who knew that Anheuser-Busch supported Democrats?
Watch the video below:[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMnaSiEjRis&w=640&h=360]
Feature image via author composite/Wikimedia Commons