It’s that time of year, folks. What time of year, you ask? Why, time for that pesky liberal war on Christmas to start again! As everyone knows, any acknowledgment of or support for any holiday other than Christmas during wintertime is tantamount to throwing Christians to the lions again.
Or, maybe that’s just the persecution complex talking that many conservative Christians seem to have.
In any case, every year, Republicans whine the same things about nonreligious Starbucks cups and the phrase “happy holidays.” This year, though, things will be different! At least, they will according to Trump’s former campaign manager and current media shill Corey Lewandowski.
..which means a great Christmas! Which you can say again — Merry Christmas — because Donald Trump is now the President! You can say it again! It’s okay to say! It’s not a pejorative word anymore!
Here’s the video:
— Fox News (@FoxNews) December 7, 2016
I have a couple of issues I’d like to bring up for Mr. Lewandowski.
One — Nobody gives a shit if you say Merry Christmas. It’s the “Happy Holidays” thing YOU take offense to that seems to set people off. When was the last time you told somebody Merry Christmas and they were like “hey, bro, fuck you!”? That doesn’t happen. Now if I go in public in my very red town and start Happy Holidaysinging (that’s totally a word shut up) around, you can bet I’ll get stony silence or a hard look if I happen to speak to a member of the Fox News crowd.
Two — Say it slowly with me — Donald Trump is not the president. Do you know how this works? The electors vote on the 19th of December. The new president is sworn in on the 20th. Trump is nothing but an admitted rapist and con man at this point in time.
Relatively soon, he will become the overlord and begin the erosion of American democracy and restoration of Christmas, a holiday which is under massive attack by
overbranding and consumerism liberal scum. Until then, you know what? Hey bro, fuck you, happy holidays. We’ve got one more year. Might as well just go with it!
P.S. — here’s a video of the 8th time President Obama celebrated the lighting of the National Christmas Tree to blow Corey’s little mind:
Featured image via video screenshot