Top Ten Things To Do If You Meet A Transgender Woman In The Bathroom

These are confusing times. Republicans tell us that men are putting on dresses and going into the lady’s bathroom to spy on and/or molest our womenfolk. Sure, there’s not a single recorded case of this ever happening in the United States but it COULD happen so we need to be prepared!

To help out American women who are suddenly living in fear of sharing the bathroom with a transgender women they suspect might secretly be a man, we here at the If You Only News have put together this helpful list of things to do when confronted with a transgender woman in the bathroom:

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10. Ask for a courtesy flush if they had some bad guacamole for lunch.

9. Compliment them on their shoes.

8. Ask them where they got that gorgeous purse from.

7. Offer them lipstick if they run out.

6. Talk about the cute new intern in accounting.

5. Not stare at them. Seriously, stop it.

4. Pepper spray anyone that tries to pepper spray them while they wash their hands.

3. Use your phone to record the police harassing them so they can sue later.

2. Treat them exactly like you would any other woman in the bathroom.

And if you can’t bring yourself to do any of the above, there’s always the number one thing to do if you find yourself sharing a public restroom with a transgender woman:

1. Mind your own fucking business and let the woman pee in peace.

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